For days now I’ve been attempting to take my mind off what’s going on outside my bubble. My tiny little home bubble. Dates didn’t work, working out only worked while I was doing it, movies barely. So the last couple days I’ve been diving into cleaning and organizing and fixing shit.
This little endeavor which actually seemed a lot less a few days ago probably started from me pinning something on some site that made me think “Oh, that should be fun”. That actually led me to dump all my clothes out on the floor and start going through all of them again to donate. Then, because I have OCD and ADD and I’m sure a bunch of other acronymed crap, makes me move on to a thousand different things at once.
But anyway, the point is I’m actively looking for something to de-stress, de-clutter and blur my mind for a moment or two. One other thing that I started to do is to make Christmas lists for people I’m buying for. I know this seems a bit too early but I’ve a giver… I like to give good gifts. One of my ideas this year is to bundle so stuff from the year they were born like movie, record, candy, magazine and book. Sounds almost cool right? Well it was until I got to my niece. I searched for the most popular book from 2012 and came up with (drum roll please) Fifty Shades of Grey. I’m not giving my niece that book. It’s bad enough that I’ll have to admit to her one day that I actually read that diatribe of crap.
But it’s still a fun process of looking for the best thing to give each person. I’ve said this before but in my family, that’s how we either show we care OR we show the other person just how much we don’t know about them by buying them the most horrible stuff. Moving on though…
So even at work I was tired of getting all these news stories that were depressing and Taylor Swift’s life is not anywhere near breaking news to me so I came home at lunch, changed into my workout clothes and went back to work to move a bunch of heavy shit around that wasn’t even my job but I was tired of seeing chaos all around me. It’s typically human nature to try to fix things that are broken or chaotic around you, or at least it is with me. I just want to fix shit, people, things… What ever is around.
I’m also trying to take my mind of a mini-little surgery I’m having on Friday. I have a shard of bone, from a previous injury (long sad story) that is stabbing my nerve in my mouth… All that sounds awesome right? So I’m going in Friday afternoon to have this done. Now, a normal person would probably ask someone for help. They’d probably say, “Hey I need you to pick me up and take me home and just randomly check to make sure I haven’t swallowed my tongue or something but who ever said I was normal? Why is it so freaking hard for me to ask for help?
The only people that know I’m doing this is my BFF because she’s my beneficiary in case anything happens and my boss because he’d wonder where I was if he ever showed up. Sometimes I wish I could just be more girly, not that that is a girly thing but that is the main reason why I need a man that will force me to take care of myself or he will for me. I need someone who will always look out for my best interests because apparently I have a hard time doing that for myself. I have no problem doing that in return but it’s the whole, “asking for help” thing.
Blah, broken record anyway. By the time the “one” I’m supposed to be with shows up I’ll be too tired for him anyway. I’d probably say “Seriously, it’s taken you this long to find me? Lets just have sex and then you can go”. Come on now, I still know what’s most important 🙂
So apparently all I have on my mind is cleaning, organizing and sex now. But instead of cleaning up my bedroom, that I’ve trashed, for some fun, I’ll be cleaning it up so I don’t trip on anything in my post-surgery coma I plan to be in. But you know me, my weekends never go as planned. We shall see. I really just want something completely unexpectedly awesome to happen because now I feel like I’m just cheating all of you with boring thoughts lately… I wish I had fireworks.
That’s all folks…