Today has been an utterly bland day. Nothing crazy at work, came home after, watched a bit of TV, worked out. Absolutely nothing of any importance happened today. Sometimes my horoscope just makes me laugh. It’s a lot like the weatherman, mostly wrong but strangely interesting to listen to. Well, actually it said something about ‘if you choose to stay home today that’s ok but if you don’t you might just met the next love of your life’ or some other BS. And shockingly, I still stayed in.
One main reason that I stayed home tonight is because my body has been betraying me lately. I’m not sure if it’s because my sleep sucks, my change in health habits or emotional stress but it’s not been feeling right for a few days. I do notice that when I am under emotional stress, anger, sadness or pain my OCD goes crazy or crazier.
I don’t really remember being this OCD about things as a kid. It’s gotten worse through the years and it mainly focuses on numbers. I suppose that’s why I became an accountant, sort of (one of my many hats). My number is five. Someone told me once that this is a God number. I don’t really know what that meant but she said it was good. This started out to be a volume thing. If the TV or radio had a number volume it had to be on something divisible by five. But lately, I’ve been counting my steps a lot. If I’m at work and go outside for a bit I have to walk 500 steps. If I’m sitting at home I have to get up and walk 1,000 steps every hour.
It usually happens only when I’m alone and I’m sure there’s some sort of therapy to learn from this but if I don’t do those things I don’t go crazy or anything. I don’t really have any other OCD moments. I don’t have to turn the knob 4 times or check the stove 8 times or anything. I am usually paranoid that I’ve left my hair straightener on but I assume that’s a fear that a lot of women probably have.
Even feeling let down by my body today, I still ran and I do feel better now. While I was running I remembered that the Oscars are this weekend. This will be a year that I’ve seen more of the Oscar nominated movies than ever before and I’ve seen them with THE friend. He’s the only person I go to the movies with. Some of the movies were great and some not so much. I’m usually someone who has to have things blowing up or lots of sex in a movie to keep my attention but that’s one thing that he’s done for me. I’ve entertained seeing a lot more movies that I might never have seen if it weren’t for him.
One of those movies that kind of stuck with me and for some reason I think about a lot is Anomalisa. At first, I wasn’t sure if I liked it or not. It kind of struck a nerve in me for some reason but I understood the main character. It also kind of reminded me of THE friend too. There’s a guy with a mundane life who sees everyone as the same person, there’s no quality that makes them different than the next. Then he meets a girl, thinks she’s amazing but she becomes just like everyone else after a while. It’s a movie that’ll might make you think. Again, for some reason it’s stuck with me.
If my body feels the way it does right now I think I’ll take this weekend to watch some of the rest of the Oscar movies and just melt into my couch for a while. I thought about thinking up some drinking game to watch the award show to but then I realize that drinking never really goes well for me lately so that’s probably not a great idea. Maybe I’ll do something else to entertain myself.
So, boring post tonight. I’d apologize but sometimes I just need to have a boring night or two to even things out so I’m ok with it. There’s still and hour and 20 minutes left of tonight. Maybe that ‘love of my life’ horoscope thing will still come true. Ha, kidding.
Hope you’re all having a great week.