I hate the quietness of my home lately but I hate the menial task of going out just to go out. There’s always some place to go, always somewhere to be but I like putting on a pair of yoga pants and watching stupid crap on tv, all while turning my phone off to not be distracted.
I’m tired of the same boys lately. I’m tired of putting one of many faces on. I’m just tired. I don’t want to work my ass off to impress a-holes anymore. I’m tired of a-holes. Where are all the good, down-to-earth, sweet, charming and non-whorish men? Their existence is extinct.
What happened to easy? Where’s all the connections gone? Where’s the comfortable? I don’t even know why I try anymore. Even the good ones aren’t so good and the ones that look good on paper are usually the biggest a-holes.
I really just want a man who gets me. I want a man who isn’t afraid to say the things he wants to say. I want a man who wants the same things I do. Is everyone just damage goods at this point and you’re just looking for the best of the worst? I’m not giving up on this. Even if I have to travel the world to find what I’m looking for, I’ll find it. I just hope I’m not too tired by the time I get there.
Today is tough. Today is a day when I wish it wasn’t so quiet once I got home. Today is a day when I wish I’d let someone stay long enough to ask me how my day was. That’s all.